It’s been a full year since we were addressed with news that the UK was officially entering a lockdown to strengthen our battle against Covid-19. From then, we’ve been on a ride of many more versions-of-a-lockdown, tier systems, a taste of freedom and then right back round it all again. For everyone, regardless of what they do or what their situation may be, this has been a hell of a year that we never expected. We’ve adapted to one of the biggest crises our country has ever faced and kept people safe by making big compromises. WELL DONE TO US.
Throughout the bizarre lockdown life however, I’ve learnt an awful lot and seen a significant shift in my outlook on things I don’t usually have the time to consider so intently. This series of unfortunate events has for me, led to a series of fortunate lessons I’m thankful to have learnt. I've summarised these into a neat list of eight things, because we all love a list when reading blogs for some reason.
The benefits of a routine
I’d never realised until being furloughed and entering lockdown how beneficial a routine, even the simplest one, is for my mental health. To have just a couple of jobs that need to be done by a certain time give a purpose for the day, and therefore something to get out of bed for. When in the swing of normal life and going to work everyday, all we tend to want is a break. But when we get it, it’s crazy how quickly the honeymoon period ends and the excitement wears off (especially when it’s forced upon us). After a short while, too much free time can be overwhelming as there don’t seem to be enough extra-curricular projects that both fill the time and provide some sort of relief.
The lack of a normal routine, for me, then led to feelings of guilt when watching TV at a time that I’d usually be doing anything but that. A 2pm installment of Friends is nowhere near as satisfying as a Tuesday evening installment at 8pm curled up in pyjamas. Ordinarily this would be the lazy couple of hours that I’d look forward to after a usual, more productive day. I will never take for granted being in the busy swing of normal life again, when simple things can be enjoyed for the valuable escape from routine they provide.
Home is truly the best place
Quality time in my home is the best, because it’s where I feel most like myself. This certainly stems from other (pre-Covid) situations too because when invited to a friend or relative's house for the evening, if the offer to stay overnight is put on the table, 98% of the time I’ll avoid it if the distance allows. Let’s face it – nothing beats the comfort of going to sleep and waking up in your own bed. Am I right?
That’s what lockdown has taught me about my home; while so many have been craving those holidays away (that’s not to say the ‘h’ word hasn’t crossed my mind), I’ve been so thankful to be in my comfortable little flat with what I’m sure is probably an indent the precise size of my bum on my side of the sofa. Life is busy, which is great, but I’ll certainly treasure my time at home so much more in the future now. We’re lucky to have it.
Doing what you actually enjoy makes you feel good
Lockdown has brought a great deal of time for reflection, which once the initial freaking out stage is complete, can be a positive. There’s been a lot of attempting to figure out what we want, what our skills are and what we should/could be doing with our much more valuable free time moving forward. Because believe it or not, there is still going to be some free time to fill when back in the pace of normal life.
From this, I’ve realised how important it is to harness something that genuinely brings joy because throwing yourself into something you feel passionately about will result in more enjoyable, less ‘hard’ work. While many people have missed their supposedly 'boring' jobs a far greater deal than they could have ever imagined, it’s also opened a gateway to other possibilities we can pursue for ourselves. It sounds crazy, but I may have never considered starting this blog if it wasn’t for the pandemic.
Doing something that makes you no money, but gives you triple the value of your pay cheque in happiness and therefore enriches your life in other ways, is worth pursuing when you can.
BUT...don’t pile on the pressure unnecessarily
As a lockdown furlough-er, I’ve spent a lot of time dreading the question: “What have you been doing then?” when chatting with people about the pandemic (because honestly, what else has there been to speak about?) We know the intention is good, but answering it usually comes with a lot of overthought panic. They must think I’m so lazy... I bet they would have done so much more than me... I hope they understood what I was saying... that kind of thing. But I’ve come to realise that actually, I don’t need to impress people all the time. Being furloughed has opened doors to try new things, but it doesn’t mean that everyone's judging me because 'they' would of started a business, published a book, worked another job or flown to the moon.
It all comes down to getting through each day with whatever situation the pandemic has left you in. It’s far too easy to compare ourselves to others and not see past that. I’ll likely never experience a time without the usual work routine again, so trying new things and filling the time has been a must. But realising that I’m just a human who can only do and take so much has been an equally, if not greater, lesson. Unnecessary pressure is exactly that, it’s unnecessary.
Self-confidence can change, rapidly
The increased amount of time we’ve been given has unsurprisingly come with some negatives, one of these being a setback in self-confidence. The sheer length of time away from things that used to be normal has made them seem... scarier. Even the most simple things we'd never think twice about previously, like replying to a professional email, speaking to someone on the phone or even just going to an appointment are all of a sudden more alien. Admitting this can make us feel silly, and therefore has the power to significantly knock self-confidence.
There are always going to be people who have seemingly become the best version of themselves this year, thanks to the cards they’ve been dealt. But it’s so important to remember that they are always showing the part they want to, the social media friendly side that portrays them in the best light. Don’t let this knock self-belief; take some time-out and remember that those simple things that now seem scary were possible before so will be achieved again. Everything takes time. It will vary from day-to-day but if something can be reversed one way, surely it can be reversed back the other way?
Recognising how you feel in yourself, how you truly feel, is something we’ve had a lot more time to do and I’m taking that as a positive despite how hard it’s been at times.
The power of a mobile phone
A shameful lesson to have learnt is that my mobile phone runs my life. I can’t even begin to tell you how many books I’ve kept meaning to get into, and still haven’t gotten round to, because that dangerous scrolling loop on my phone is a far easier quick-fix. The more time I’ve had for other things, the more time I’ve spent on my phone. Addicted? No… but sometimes I’ve felt that I’m headed that way! However, if it wasn’t for this year, I probably wouldn't have realised how reliant I am on it. I’m hopeful that coming out of this lockdown-full year, the change in my outlook will take effect. Plus I’m going to try and be a little (a lot) stricter on myself with it.
Realising who, out of my 424 Facebook friends, actually cares
Realising which friends and acquaintances genuinely care, and add a positive slice to our life, is SO important. The people who have messaged to check-in, or those that I've felt the need to message for the same reasons, are the ones worth keeping close. What’s happened over the past year has had an impact on everyone, regardless of their situation. Yes, even that stupidly rich person who everything seems to go right for will have struggled in some way. Those who can put everything aside, forgetting how long it’s been since you last reached or how your circumstances may differ, to genuinely see how you're doing and check-in are absolute keepers.
The value of family
It’s nice to have people that care, which brings me onto the value of family. It may feel that they are a burden at times, but my experience has shown that the love and support they bring totally overrides any feelings of annoyance! No matter how many family members a person may have close by, feeling lonely is OK and a lot more normal than I had considered. I used to think that because I’m fortunate enough to be surrounded by loving people, I didn’t have the right to feel lonely because I have so much physical presence around me. But now I realise that it's possible for a knockback (like this giant pause button we’ve all had pressed on our lives) to cause feelings of loneliness.
Those that I hold closest to my heart (Jordan, my amazing parents and my beautiful sister) have been the people who have been there for me without choice; because they ‘just are’. No thinking needed. Never before has a simple text conversation, or a virtual quiz, been so precious. I’m so thankful for them.
My heart genuinely goes out to those who have been living alone physically during this time, I can only imagine how challenging this rollercoaster must be. You are far stronger than you realise for getting through it.
The final (and most important) lesson is that coming to the end of this year and feeling that you’ve not learnt one lesson, or haven’t done, created or changed anything is FINE! It’s applaudable to take tangible lessons from an overall negative situation, but being someone that’s just cracked on as before and is finishing this period as the same person that went into it is just as admirable. We all take what we want from things and are affected in different ways. Some people might want to just strike this year out and pretend it never happened. You do you.
Sincerely,
A lockdown learner